This Amalgamation

The crappy part about diseases, especially terminal ones

2009-08-06T23:00:00.003-04:00

In a recent conversation with a family member, I was finally able to articulate the problem with terminal diseases. Without discussing the obvious, like death, I think the problem is the reduced quality of life the patient suffers. Modern day medicine has found a way to extend life, but it has failed in preserving the quality of life one has grown accustomed to. For me, the sad part of learning of someone's illness is not the fear of their death (which always lurks in the background), but the nightmare of day-to-day living.

Recklessly Seeking Sex on Craigslist

2009-04-21T22:08:00.002-04:00

Had to share this great article: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/19/fashion/19craigslist.html

24 Hour Memo Girl

2009-04-20T23:02:00.002-04:00

So, as the title of the post suggests, I've come up with a new description and job title! I am becoming a pro at doing things in a semi-decent haphazard manner in 24 hours. My job requires me to do things in a rushed manner.

I was thinking about writing about how comic is the practice of law and how ignoble and washed out its practitioners. I used to think of legal ethics and believe in them. I find that the practice of law is slowly eroding my belief in good. Even the law breeds conflicts of interest.

Another idea I had the other day was to form a non-profit focused on getting the fed'l government to give more student GRANTS and to get the schools to lower their tuition. I don't understand why schools can take congress' money and congress cannot simultaneously make sure that schools that receive aid provide "affordable" education to its students. And I don't mean providing student loans as part of a financial package, I mean grants or lowered tuition. The system is such a racket.

My new line of advice for those wishing to pursue a college/associate's degree is that before one decides which program to choose, make sure that there are jobs for it. I tell people to open up their newspapers, go on craigslist, go on USAJobs.com, go to monster, and research which jobs are the most plentiful with the most pay. Once they figure that out, read up on the industry and find out why it is exploding. After conducting research, go out there and get the degree that you need to get an entry level job..and nothing more. Any other sort of education is a waste, if your goal is to make a buck from it. If your goal is to sit around and learn, then ask yourself if you can afford it. If you can't afford it, then god or fate or whatever meant that you were never destined to be socrates. It's as simple as that. Anyone, rather correct that, any low/moderate income person who cannot pay for school, but takes out loans for an education that will not help them secure better employment, is a fool, and is only guaranteeing deeper misery. I say this because with their gained knowledge, education, and new found unemployability, they will be able to analyze their poverty in depth.

Job Ranting part I

2009-04-17T13:14:00.003-04:00

I don't think I've started ranting about my job on this blog yet. I think I've been pretty quiet about it. In fact, I've been pretty quiet about alot of things on here lately. I'm writing because I need an outlet and to address the injustices (if I can call it that) of my life...lol....well of my workplace environment.

I think I'm starting to really hate my job. And not because of the work, I enjoy the work, but because of my employers. Is it me, or do all employers think they can treat you like crud because they pay you a salary? My boss treats me like crud. He never says thank you, always give me projects last minute, always blames others on his mistakes, and never properly supervises my work. He's even taken to referring to me as "a mouth to feed."

I've been reflecting alot about this most recent recession. I wondered what would happen to me if I did lose my job. Questions arise like how will I pay my student loans, who will pay my credit card, and how will I pay my rent??? I used to panick about losing my job.

I no longer care.

If they fired me, I would file for unemployment and move to a state I've always wanted to live in. I'd put my loans on deferment and "move-on" (literally and figuratively) with my life. It wouldn't be the end of the world. It might just help me get out of this shit state and this shit job.

I am tired of taking crap on a daily basis because my employers think they are gods. Enough is Enough.

I'll post more later.

Ralph Nader's "Uncle Tom" comment

2008-11-05T03:16:00.006-05:00

Within an hour or so after Barack Obama's victory, Ralph Nader said "Barack Obama is going to have to choose between being an Uncle Sam or being an Uncle Tom." Mr. Nader made his gaff during an interview on the Fox News Channel during it's post election coverage. The interviewer strongly voiced his disapproval of Mr. Nader's reference to "Uncle Tom," but Mr. Nader made no excuses. He simply shrugged his shoulders and said that it didn't matter because he could end the conversation at his choice. Mr. Nader then referred to the ongoing video conference between himself and the interviewer, and said "All I'm doing is looking into this camera, I can turn this camera off whenever I want." The interviewer didn't relent, and continued to press on about Mr. Nader's gaff and how Mr. Nader had practically ended his future political career. The interviewer, in shock, told him that it was a shame that such a comment was made by someone who was once such a great consumer advocate. The interview ended there and the program abruptly went to a commercial.

An Obituary of a Life

2008-05-04T00:56:00.002-04:00

I found this among my papers when I was cleaning house this evening. It is something I wrote in college. Just as a way of background, the professor asked us to try to sum up what is in a life. He gave us a scenario where a man was found dead in the street and no one knew him. The idea of the assignment was to sum up his life in an essay. The quintessential question was "What is in a life?" At the time I thought I had succeeded in being entirely nondescript. I now fear I may have told the professor a great deal about my own life. Reading this after so long amused me. Hope it amuses you too.

A man found dead. He lived his life with breath breathing life. Oxygen = Hydrogen and other molecules. Gaseous remnants of a being that farted a century and a half before. A minute or an hour. Three feet, five fee, and 6,094,567,876 miles apart did an ass emit some gas that constitutes some composition of the air that he breathed, and saw. The particles, some dust, some gas, were illuminated for him when the sun came shining through a window. The golden rays of an abstract distant ball of light we call the sun set a fiery yellow background to the unperceivable and imperceptible particles of space that do not exist without their shiny companion, and maybe a microscope.

In his childhood there were plenty of scraped knees and burned knuckles. He vicariously lived through the adventures, fantasies, and fears manifested in his child's psyche. He was afraid of being disliked by the dog on the corner, the cat in the alley or random stupid faceless kids. Their names long forgotten long ago.

Luckily for him there were puddles in his life. Plenty of puddles. Water puddles and piss puddles. Collections of dog shit floating along mirrors in the evening reflecting. In the day reflecting things. Puddles were malleable for him. breakable, accepting, conforming to the flow of mire and dirt, engulfing. Stepping in them would make his feet slimy and wet, his toes would rub together and sores would form on them. It was just water and other stuff.

He had moments in space. Floating through memories of the past, dreams of the future, and cravings for the present. There but not there. Floating but grounded.

Occasionally walking "grounded him." The solidness, the unmoving realization, his realization, that it was there, that he was there, there as anything could have been there.

He did scratch his chin when it itched. He did pick his nose when it was full. Father time served as his reminder. It would speak to him from within the deep recesses of his consciousness. It served as his reminder. Reminding him of his time and the value of constantly focusing on the time. He wasted a lot of time thinking about time. He followed the rules of time with the sun and moon and everyone/thing else. Their rotational orbit around this materiality reflected his rotational orbit around things, lots of little insignificant things, like his life, his materiality.

His life was full of shadows cast by people and buildings, chatter of his fellow beings, and cracked lips and hands of the black old man asking him for money on the corner. Sometimes his street would overheat due to the temperature, which would create sticky pools of gun tacked to the bottom of his shoe. His shoes would wear, pants he would pair, shirts he would shirk and the think hair of his head and coarse curly hair of his pubic would he stroke.

He managed to maintain a successful working relationship with his penis. His penis was a wrinkly, layered, funny looking hardworking co-worker that stayed loyal throughout his life. Except for in the end, when he pissed himself.

Cars would beep on the street. Faceless machines and people everywhere. Walking, rolling, running, crawling, on his street corner, in his grocery store, on his bus, in his car, his life, faceless.

My rant about gas

2008-04-29T08:58:00.005-04:00

I don't care that the price of gas is high. I understand that. I am infuriated however, when I see that BP and Shell's profits are near record proportions. We are being gouged! The gas and oil companies are making a forturne on us while home foreclosures nearly doubled this past quarter. I am sick and tired of filling the pockets of these rich capitalists!!! So, in my anger, I've decided that I will not drive my car on long trips anymore. I am protesting this mess.

I plan to ride my bike to work, and I might try it, but out here in the sticks of New Jersey such a venture could mean life or death. If biking to work doesn't work, I will try to limit my driving to trips that are absolutely necessary. Something has to give and it looks like it will be me.

Love

2008-04-12T16:02:00.004-04:00

Art by Abigail Greenwald

KBR

2008-02-07T20:16:00.000-05:00

My father got the job in Iraq! He will be working for Halliburton's Subsidiary KBR. They plan to ship him out next week.

I'm somewhat in shock about all of this. As I draft his pertinent legal documents, I can't help but reflect on how crazy this world is.

My father is going to Iraq...Mosul of all places....nineveh...the city of Jonah and the whale...

I'm somewhat jealous when I read about the historic significance of the place he will be traveling to, but then I read all the stories about the psycho insurgents who like to blow up contactractors who are minding their own business in the bases....I get leery.

These past two months have been a trip. I just turned 25 but I feel like my age hasn't caught up with all of my experiences.

My mother was in the hospital this past month for a month. Now she will be moving out of her house and into my brother's house. We're closing up shop in brooklyn and needless to say, my heart is broke.

While my mother goes on life support my father begins his journey on a road to a hellish war torn place, I am somehow stuck in the middle of this whirlwind.

I'm speechless. I am aghast at the incredulousness of life and the ridiculousness of it's stories. These stories, the very fabric of these stories, make me sick. Only a fool could dream up these impossibilities.

I know I am young because I am still shocked by it all. Maybe the despair that creeps into my heart is a sign of health and youthful vigor? Maybe it's true when they say that life is odder than fiction?

I spoke with my other sister, my father's daughter, last night about this rigmarole. I haven't spoken to her in ten years. Oddly enough, she was unusually candid. The first thing she said to me was "at first I didn't care about it (my father going to iraq) but now I really do." It was nice to talk to her. We spoke about her future. Her desire to reconnect with her religion, her two jobs, and her SATs. I'm really proud of her. I told her that. I was emphatic about it in fact.

God, life goes on, and we end up speaking to people we never would dream of. Life has a strange way of doing that, doesn't it?

sometime in September of '07

2008-01-24T23:04:00.000-05:00

I found this gravestone at a pet cemetery.

a hot summer day

2008-01-14T21:29:00.001-05:00

Lately, I've found myself returning to times and places that I haven't thought about in quite some time. Presently, I am recalling this summer. The Department of Education decided to close down the alternate high school system. My mother had worked for the system for the past ten years. She returned to work there after her open heart surgery. She started in the South Bronx and would drive an hour every day to get there. Through Eastern Parkway, up Flatbush Avenue, down one of the side streets to Atlantic Avenue where she'd turn onto the road that would bring her to the Brooklyn Bridge, up the FDR, onto the 3rd avenue bridge, into the heart of the Bronx. She would encounter students who were barely that. Her job was to introduce them to poetry and publishing. She'd teach them how to read and constantly attempt to inspire them to learn. From there she went to East New York and continued to teach. For the past ten years she'd get up, put her shoes on, no matter how terrible she felt, and would go to work.

This summer was when the DOE began to break her down. They decided to excise (fire but keep on staff) all the teachers in the Alternate High School System. THEY made all the teachers reapply with a resume, and cover letter, and finally go on a panel interview. I drove her to that interview. It was a hot summer day. My mother was so nervous she didn't eat. She could barely walk because of her diabetes and low blood sugar. She went despite her disorientation and sickness.

Afterward, we went to coco rocco in Park slope on 5th ave. and ate a proper meal. We had some kind of hope then, that maybe she'd get the job. As we ate, a meter cop gave her car a ticket.

She didn't get the job. Instead, they placed her in a middle school where she'd sit watching a teaching fellow (first year teacher) teach all day long. They also gave her a special ed. 6th grade class where she would teach them health...something she hadn't taught in years because she was busy teaching GED students how to read and write.

It was so hot that summer day. The day wheezed under her anguish and despair. It signaled the beginning, or maybe the continuation, of the end of a career.

ode to '07

2008-01-04T20:17:00.001-05:00

I lived in the quaintest village I've yet to live in.
I also lived in the nicest house I've ever lived in.
said goodbye to my friend u.
started and ended a coin business
wrote my first wills and trusts.
snow shoed for the first time.
took rock climbing classes.
went skiing on pico with jon and nicole.
passed estates with a b plus by listening to the classes online only
conducted my first child custody hearing
graduated law school - had mom and dad there for a weekend
left vt
said hello to nj
lived with my lover and two crazy cats
studied for and passed the bar
started my clerkship and part-time nannyship
Mom got sick again, heart and kidneys this time.
low key new years...good food and companionship,
what else could I ask for?

Suburbs in the Wee Hours of Twilight

2007-12-16T14:52:00.001-05:00

I've recently discovered a terrific website. It's MIT's Open Courseware Website. The website has all of MIT's 1800 courses, with syllabi, reading materials, student assignments, and lecture notes (power point). The mission of the website is to enable an education "free for all." I really admire the project and spent endless hours reading about urban planning and development last night. It's a great starting point anyone looking learning to embark on self-study. It's like going to college without getting any credit! So, if you like to learn for the sake of learning, I highly recommend this website.

On another note, a friend of mine is having her engagement party today. I decided not to go because I had to work all weekend and the party is at least one and a half hours away from my home. I feel guilty for not going. I plan to attend her wedding which will be in another country but that fact is no solace to me. Is it ok to skip your best friend's (from H.S.) engagement party? Any thoughts?

Sometimes I feel like life is one big chore. It's comprised of a series of different tasks that one must do. Whether it's eating healthy, going to the gym, doing work on the weekend, cleaning, and going to engagement parties in another state, it all feels like one big drag. I wonder if most people feel as I do. I also wonder if this feeling will only grow as I age.

Oh yeah, my father got an interview with the American construction company in Iraq. He has to go for a physical. If he passes his physical he will be sent to Iraq in early February. I reason that the company offered him an interview in order not to appear as if they engaged in age discrimination. Apparently, they offer $80,000 per year (non-taxable) plus benefits and a one million dollar life insurance policy. I wonder if I should sign up.

The Holiday Seasons and our Recession

2007-11-28T21:09:00.000-05:00

I heard on the radio the other day about how this year's holiday sales revenues would be lower this year than any other year. People are feeling the crunch.

I certainly am.

For the past two weeks, I've been pretending like I'm not pretending that I have money. It is such a good feeling to buy gifts for people you like. I have to remind myself that I'm in no positition to partake in the spending melee. However, I certainly wish I could buy a gift for every person I know.

This year is the first where I am not in school and get to experience the holiday season at its best. When I was in school I don't think I ever had a chance to focus on the holiday season because I was always studying for finals. December meant a time to hunker down, write outlines, late nighters, and frigid weather. I didn't have time to think about the holidays and what they mean to this Country. I remember wondering why sales revenues went up on the holidays and WHO could possibly be spending so much money.

As a taxpayer, the holiday season has taken on a whole new meaning. It's a time to eat cookies and send people cards. It's a time to spoil your nieces and nephews with money you don't have. It's a time to go to Target, along with hoards of people, in search of the perfect present for someone you barely know. And it's certainly a time to spend.

This holiday season is certainly a new experience for me. I imagine it's quite an experience for many other Americans who are feeling the pinch of a recession. My father, one of those Americans, told me he was going to sign up to go to Iraq. He explained to me that he needed to go because his business (construction) was suffering from the recession.

He said there is an American Company who builds many different sorts of structures. Apparently, they pay anywhere from 100-120k a year. He told me about his two Colombian friends who went and all the wealth they amassed because of their employment with the company. Then he told me about their boss who left the compound one night and never returned because his head was chopped off. I think he expected me to be shocked because after he told me about the beheading he was silent for a minute. Nothing amazes me anymore.

After I attempted to bring up some of the 'weaker' aspects of his application, most notably, his age and health, he started to list his skills as if he were on the interview.

I'm not sure if he will make it to an interview. While I love my father and wish him much forturne, I do not think it the greatest idea for him to work in Iraq. Either way, I told him I was proud he was brave enough to walk into a den of death for a decent paycheck. A part of me wants him to get the job. It's just the reality of our times and what is necessary to survive.

Another Thanksgiving

2007-11-23T22:00:00.001-05:00

This year was a success! My mother loves this holiday more than any other holiday. She's been home lately because of her accident and so I felt it necessary to do it up properly.

We had the meal at my brother's house and my entire immediate family was present. The food was a hit. I got a few recipes from a very old woman who hasn't cooked in years. I made rosemary turkey, brisket, sweet potatoe pie, grilled veggies, stuffing and mashed potatoes, among other things.

It was really nice to cook for my whole family. I don't think I've ever done that before. It was good.

It was nice hanging with my mom too. She has all these great stories about how she has acquired the different pieces of her antique furniiture collection. Her stories always begin with her walking home to her Village apartment at a quarter to six in the morning. She never remembers why she was coming home so late, she just remembers the first time she laid eyes on the antique, and knew she had to have it.

The story she told me this trip involved the handles on a desk she built sometime in the 70's. She created a desk out of an old iron sewing machine by adding her self designed wooden desktop and drawers to its iron base. On her way home one morning she spotted an old antique dresser. She noticed the handles immediately and knew they would be perfect for her new desk. She quickly pulled out a dime and attempted to unscrew the handles from the desk. While she was attempting to remove the handles the super came out. He saw her and told her to wait. He went inside the building and returned with a screwdriver. He removed all the handles for her.

At this point, as in many of her stories from her youth, she said that the super helped her because of her beauty and her youth.

When she finished her story, it suddenly occured to me that she hasn't brought home an antique in years.
I asked her about it.
She stated matter of factly, "I stopped living."

Milestone

2007-11-15T22:53:00.000-05:00

I thought graduating from law school was great. Now I know passing two bar examinations is even better. When I graduated from law school I didn't really feel like I was saying goodbye to school forever. I knew I would have to study for weeks and weeks on end to pass the bar exams. The ten weeks that ensued after graduation were probably the most stressful weeks of my life. It was a dreadful period where I quarrelled with many loved ones and generally looked like poop. I would study 10-12 hours per day 6 days per week. There were times when I couldn't even tell the difference between odd and even.

It's weird to know that I passed the bars. It's weird to know that I will never need to be "academic" again. If I choose to take another bar, it is by my own volition and I will do so with the confidence that I passed one of the hardest bars in the country.

Attaining this milestone is also somewhat daunting. I wonder what will happen with my life after this point? I fear this will be my last great accomplishment. I want to do great things with my life. I don't care if I'll be poor. Sure being poor sucks. But, it's not anything new and doing something empty and meaningless sucks even more. I want to love what I do and I really want to help people.

I also wonder if after this, time will just fly by and I will lose all markers to demarcate the passage of it. I know it's inevitable, like everything else in life, I'm just trying to savor this moment and really enjoy it.

I'm so sick

2007-10-25T21:59:00.000-04:00

Of the cost of living
Of helping other countries that don't want our help
of selfishness
of a predominantly christian country
that doesn't practice christian values
of the disappearing line between lower class and middle class
of food prices
and clothes prices
and rent
and how it seems like things are getting more expensive
but i'm not making enough money to keep pace
i'm pissed at the american dream
for working hard for an education and
am still poor

i fucking hate this country
i hate the fact we don't have healthcare
i hate the fact we're dumping billions of dollars into iraq
when we can't even help out the people who are losing
their homes because of the fires in california
and the mortgage housing crises.

i wish people would care about old and sick people
i wish we were more humanitarian
where government was an embodiment of the people's will
i wish the people had a will.
one that would encompass the small man

i hate sickness
and i hate how we work full time and have a part time
life.

i'm just so goddamn sick of it.

the civics lesson on child healthcare - first the soldiers now the children

2007-10-05T21:53:00.000-04:00

I usually give a political lecture to the kids when I drop them off at school. The first thing I do every morning when I get in the car is put on NPR. I don't have to set the radio, it's just all I listen to. I inadvertenly always hear something that makes me upset. I say to the kids "you hear that?!?" They never do, which is great because it gives me an opportunity to give my 3-4 minute political lecture for the day. It's probably the best civics lesson they get.

The subject this week on Morning Edition was President Bush's veto of the child health care bill. The BIPARTISAN (notice the caps) health care bill was a mere continuation and expanison of a prior health care bill that authorized the federal government to give state governments a chunk of money to spend on child healthcare. Republicans loved it because it gave states, not the federal government, the discretion in discerning which child could benefit from the program.

Now, I knew all along that Bush planned to veto the child health care bill. I was hoping that he wouldn't, but I knew that he was planning to.

This week he did.

I heard it on my way to dropping off the kids and thus our civics lesson for the week ensued:

Me: Did you hear that?
Kids: No, what's going on?
Me: President Bush is a fascist who doesn't care about anyone in this country but the wealthy.
Kids: Why?
Me: I'll tell you why. Remember when I told you about car insurance and why I can't let you sit up front (we had a different civic lessons that dealt with the definition of car and health insurance)?
Kids: Yeah.
Me: Well people in government wanted to make a rule that most little kids could go to the doctor for free. Kids even like you! But now President Bush says kids like you and kids in your class can't go to the doctor and have to remain sick...isn't that mean?
Kids: Yeah.
Me: When you go to class today be sure to tell all the kids in your class that President Bush doesn't care about kids and only cares about neoconservative ideologies.
Kids:....
Me: Bye have a great day!

And out they went! I try and impart some sort of political understanding to the young ones. I often wonder what the good is. Maybe I should allow them to be ignorant as long as they can?

After I dropped them off, I heard that senior Republicans are very upset with President Bush for vetoing the bill. Congress plans to vote to over ride it on Oct. 18. I hope they are successful. Finally the President is isolated from his party and stabs his loyal congressional Republicans in the back. It serves the Congressional Republicans right for all the times they blindly supported the President.

The clincher of this debacle is that not only does the veto stop an expansion of child healthcare, the veto fails the children who are currently in the program. If a new bill isn't passed within a few weeks, even the poor children won't have healthcare because the states will not have the finances to pay for it.

It's political Russian roulette and I am shocked and aghast that the President is willing to play this game while the lives of young children are on the line. First the soldiers, now the children. You can't blame the Democrats because both parties wanted this bill. So it's the elected officials (i.e. Congress) v. Bush (the man who stole the presidency).

I cannot wait for a regime change.

The discreetness of it all

2007-09-24T20:56:00.000-04:00

I find myself returning to past obsessions and mulling over them. Sometimes I approach them in a different way, I suppose some would call this maturity.

I've recently found myself in a new network of people. I find it difficult to integrate into their world, partake in their clique, and feel like my opinions are generally accepted. I wonder if this is a malady most face. It seems like a theme is unraveling where I am generally the odd man out. When I have these feelings, I wonder if this "reality" is real or is it my insecurity rearing its ugly head. I also find I am somewhat paranoid about fitting in, being accepted and following the pack. I find that I tend to detest a group's identifiable leaders. I notice how others gravitate to them in the beginning and within a short amount of time, take what the identified leaders state more and more readily. I wonder if I think about these things too much or are just insecure.

I thought I cured these problems in fourth grade, and then I thought I cured them in 9th grade, and I really thought I cured them in College, and law school...I wish I knew what it was that holds me back. Maybe I'm not the pack rat sort. Or maybe I like to form my own pack and be its own leader. Or maybe I'm more egalitarian...

Which brings me to the second thing I've been mulling over lately: the oddities of communication. Sometimes I find it hard to confront people, and I don't, and I think of all the smart and true things I really wanted to say, but never said, because I was too afraid. I contrast these instances of my life to other instances where I say too much and end up hurting those I love because I believe I am being "open" and "truthful." I see alot of this in my line of work. I see people who can't communicate, who can't follow up, and then I see instances of that very same avoidance in my own life, and I wonder what is the cause of this symptomatic inability to communicate amongst us?

recap

2007-09-11T21:01:00.000-04:00

It's time to pick up this dusty old blog, wipe off the rust, and start writing again.

It's been some time since my last blog. My last entry was a nostalgic picture of Vermont, exactly how I'd like to remember it.

I now find myself in the land of strip malls with tanning salons every block and terrible urban planning. I feel like I live in LA. (I've never been to LA but I heard it's impossible to get around on a pair of feet). One can't walk anywhere here. You can't even make a left turn without making two rights turns, people are allowed to drive their SUVs onto white shiny beaches, and recycling is limited to plastic and aluminum...that's right, I'm on the Jersey shore. The environmental degradation is saddening. It makes me appreciate Vermont and appreciate how people really cared about their environment.

I got to my office and the first thing I noticed was that the clerk before me didn't recycle. I asked him about it and he seemed to act as if recycling didn't exist. After his departure, I spoke with the secretary and it turned out we do recycle! She gladly got me a box which I promptly parked near my desk. I was increduluous to think how any law office wouldn't recycle considering all the mounds of paper legal work generates.

When I began the job (the first day) I thought to myself how I would finally have a few hours off after work - y'know revisit my past passions...think again! I quickly found out that law school made me a workaholic, where working till 7/8/9 pm is a given, and leaving at 6:30 means I'm leaving early. I feel prepared to do the work in that regard. It's certainly not difficult work, just alot of it. I guess everything after the Bar seems manageable.

So that's the recap: took the bar, working long hours, and occassionally going to gym. If I come up with any brilliant insight, I'll be sure to post it...but for now, over and out.

2007-05-03T22:59:00.000-04:00

"I wish I were in love again" - A Poem by Lorenz Hart

2007-05-03T10:39:00.000-04:00

The sleepless nights,
The daily fights,
The quick toboggan when you reach the heights—
I miss the kisses and I miss the bites.
I wish I were in love again!
The broken dates,
The endless waits,
The lovely loving and the hateful hates,
The conversation with the flying plates—
I wish I were in love again!
No more pain,
No more strain,
Now I'm sane, but ...
I would rather be gaga!
The pulled-out fur of cat and cur,
The fine mismating of a him and her—
I've learned my lesson, but I
Wish I were in love again.
The furtive sigh,
The blackened eye,
The words 'I'll love you till the day I die',
The self-deception that believes the lie—
I wish I were in love again.
When love congeals
It soon reveals
The faint aroma of performing seals,
The double-crossing of a pair of heels.
I wish I were in love again!
No more care.
No despair.
I'm all there now,
But I'd rather be punch-drunk!
Believe me, sir,
I much prefer
The classic battle of a him and her.
I don't like quiet and I
Wish I were in love again!

Listen to Garrison Keeler read it on The Writer's Alamanac.

Veganism and the end of an era

2007-04-29T12:20:00.000-04:00

Back by popular demand...

I find myself in a weird time. I'm changing places in a dramatic way. Law school is over, so is my academic career for now, though I do find myself thinking of all the night classes I will sign up for next year, so long as I get my lifetime learning credit!

I never thought I would be this sad, but I am. Law school was one hell of an experience. I came to law school with different friends and partners, now I leave law school with a whole different set of people in my roster. I am different too. You might say "more adult," whatever that means.

I finally feel like I'm embarking on the beginning of what will be considered my "adult" life. I'll be working my first "real" job starting in September. No more games.

I've also begun to experiment with Veganism. This Sunday marks the completion of 3 weeks as a vegan. I've never felt so good before. I have way more energy and am happier for it. It is difficult not to eat all the things I love. However, I think my body is appreciating my decisions. My stomach rarely hurts anymore and I have a renewed sense of energy. Plus, vegan food is so tasty! I'm on a health kick I guess you could say. I'm attempting to balance a low sodium diet with a diet full of nutrients. I call it "super food."

I'm taking my last final this Friday in Estates. I'm leaving VT. the following Monday or Tuesday to spend time with loved ones long neglected. I graduate shortly thereafter. Thanks VT and Law School. I can honestly say that I'm probably a better person for it...I guess it depends on which day you ask me. :)

Moregone

2007-03-13T00:15:00.000-04:00

The City
So, I find myself in the forests of Moregone. I've never quite experienced a city like this in my whole 24 years. Portland, the city proper, while small, has a few areas where there is an "independent edge." The city is not as big and "continuous" as NY or Paris, but it is not as small as Rochester NY, or Burlington, VT. Even though it is a "mid-size" city it has a host of interesting activities, not to mention the great vintage shops, wiccan stores, coffee houses, creperies, and pubs. People are low key and incredibly friendly. When I say "friendly" I don't mean "hi, how are you?" I mean, "let's chat for 5-10 minutes about life with a complete stranger." The city is bike, hike, and tree friendly. I've never seen such an aggressive campaign to plant trees everywhere, even in the industrial areas. While there are many wonderful things about Portland, to be perfectly honest, there is a lack of "diversity." When I say "diversity" I mean that the visible presence of African Americans is close to none. Their absence makes the city eerily aloof from participating in America's diversity.

Nature
I've never seen nature like this! Portland's surrounding areas are rich with life. The forest speaks to me. Given the damp climate, there is moss everywhere. Even though it is winter here (a mild 45-60 degree climate, with rain), the trees' bark is green because it rains so much here. I went hiking on a hike called "eagle creek." The area had hundreds of waterfalls. The first picture is an image of what my partner and I thought of as the "rock people." The forests here are rugged. It makes me think that a prince, maybe Odin, will come jumping out of the forest in his squeaky armor, onto the highway, and slaying a slithering vine that is following him and attepting to swallow the nearby cars. There is a lot of power in this forest. There is so much life. It is a serious contrast from the tundra like conditions in Vermont. The Pacific Northwest is beautiful. I am drawn to the nature here. The opportunity to buy property for low prices, meet up with gay outdoor groups, and learn how to rock climb outdoors. I am very excited about what this part of the country holds in store. Seattle is 3.5 hours away, Vancouver, BC is only 6 hours away, and San Fran is 10. It just seems like a different world. A different chapter.

U.S. Mint Presidential Proof Set!

2007-03-07T16:42:00.001-05:00

I recently launched an auction on eBay. I am auctioning off Proof Sets of the first series of Presidential dollars.

THE U.S. MINT IS CURRENTLY SELLING THEM FOR $14.95 PER SET (PLUS SHIPPING).....

I'M AUCTIONING THEM OFF AT 99 CENTS!

If you buy a set, the price of the set will likely double and triple in no time. They are a collector's set, so if you're into investing, or are searching for a gift for a family member, please check it out at:

U.S. Mint Presidential Dollar Proof Set 4 pc.

PASS THIS ON TO ANYONE YOU KNOW.

Your interest in this item will help me tremendously.

Thanks,
Rachel

U.S. Mint Presidential Proof Set!

2007-03-07T16:42:00.000-05:00

Going back to my "roots"

2007-02-15T14:55:00.000-05:00

In my effort to "enjoy" Vermont, I am rediscovering all the things I am truly in love with. I started indoor rock climbing, and I just keep thinking "god, I would've loved this when I was a kid." Indoor rock climbing brings back a host of memories for me. When I was little I would climb any tree I could find. My brother and I climbed through people's backyards and played "spies." I even climbed up the hallway walls of my my apartment. I think I even sprained my wrist when I fell off a tree.

I've also begun snowshoeing. It is such a great work out and you get to see the forest at its best. The above picture is of my hike today on Mt. Peg. The hike was glorious and difficult, but I got the hang of the snow shoes and was soon (after an hour) gliding away. I'm glad I am able to rediscover my passions. I also loved the idea of hiking and camping when I was a child. Living in the City didn't afford me the opportunities that were the most beneficial to me back then.

Tomorrow I go skiing, I loved that too when I was a kid. Don't get me wrong, I never went skiing because we couldn't afford it. I started skiing when I was in High School on school trips. Even then it was only two or three times.

After 2.5 years in Vermont, I'm wondering why I did not seize on these outdoor (and indoor) adventures before? It took me 2.5 years to realize that I could go on a hike up the mountains across the street from my house. I am glad that I finally realized the mountains. I finally woke up from my slumber and reminded myself that there are so many outdoorsy activities to love and do with vigor.

I find that these activities are not only fun, but they are excellent work outs. No wonder I was such a skinny kid. For now, I'm taking my responsibilities seriously, but I'm making sure not to neglect my health and sense of adventure. All I can say is "finally."

Want to loan money to someone really cool?

2007-02-14T20:52:00.000-05:00

You might be saying "I don't have any money." I'm here to tell you not to worry because you will get your money back.

The other day I was listening to Fair Game (you can stream the shows online) and I heard about an interesting way to "donate" money. There is a website called Kiva.org where you can loan money to an entrepreneur in a "developing" country of your choice. You can choose the term of the loan, how much money you loan, and when you will get your money back. These entrepreneurs submit their information to loan officers in their respective countries and are screened. You are able to view their loan applications and determine if they are right for you.

I was so taken by this idea. Not only do you get to help someone, but you are choosing where your money goes, and how it is used. This is unlike any "charity" because it is not a charity. This website is similar to the old adage "give a man a fish and you'll feed him for a day, teach him to fish and you feed him a lifetime." Except in this instance, these people know how to fish, you just have to give them the money to buy the tools to do it. The best part is that they pay you back so you can continue lending to others.

So if you get a chance, and want to do something good, this is for you. You will get your money back and help someone in the process.

My new favorite radio show

2007-01-31T23:51:00.000-05:00

If you have a chance, check out Fair Game on PRI. The show is also streamed online at: http://pri.morefairgame.org/index.html
This show is hip, up on current events, and funny too. I love hearing it and have become an immediate fan. The first time I turned it on and listened to it, it was by a fluke, and I didn't believe it was real. So if you have a minute, want a good laugh, and listen to some interesting reporting/stories, tune into Fair Game.

Post Odwalla

2007-01-16T22:32:00.000-05:00

I don't think I will ever be able to understand those who hold their age over others' heads. I think we all know those people who are shocked, each and every time, you tell them your age.

They say: "I am a whole 2.5 years older than you" or "I am 5 years older" or "I am 10 years older" or "isn't that cute how little she is" and it just goes on and on.

I feel bad for those people. I feel bad for the people who can't help but isolate people to make themselves feel better. Maybe they isolate people because they are isolated? Maybe they are uncomfortable because they are fraternizing with someone who is a whole 5/10/15 years younger?

I think that I am going to treat those who are younger than me with respect. If I ever say "when I was your age..." or "you'll learn," please shoot me. Those phrases are demeaning, condescending, and wholly inappropriate.

If it makes you feel better to highlight your age, to make you feel better in the face of the "younger generation's" accomplishments, then go see a shrink, don't belittle people because of your insecurities...it's unbecoming and as mature as a 15 year old, although I do know 15 year olds who are more mature.

A friend who I love dearly just left. She is significantly older than I. What is great about her is that she doesn't need to hoard her age over others to make herself feel good. In fact, the entire time I was friends with her she NEVER mentioned my age. Although she might be my oldest friend by years, she is definitely ageless at heart. I think it takes a lot of confidence and lack of self doubt to refrain from hoarding anything over another...whether it be age, looks, experience, intelligence, influence, power, money, etc. Isolating others based on their differences is plainly wrong.

A very merry birthday

2007-01-11T23:10:00.000-05:00

This year I had the pleasure of having a really nice day for my birthday. It started with a strong cup of coffee and a sunny morning. My second to oldest brother called me and wished me a happy birthday.

I helped people today. I advised people on obtaining jobs, got another interview with a criminal judge in Northern Jersey (sorry guys but this girl is taken), and helped my friend with her statement of purpose for PHD admissions. A professor I hold in high regard told me she thought my work was great in her class and that I wrote like a lawyer...it felt good. My site supervisor gave me strength and encouragement about my insane semester last spring in NYC. It's nice to know that people support and respect you.

Thanks to Josh (my new roomie), Ujvala, Jon, Ray and Rosa for a really awesome birthday dinner. Rosa did a great job on a chocolate cake. It was nice to be with people I care about on my birthday. I thought it was great that everyone showed up. It was really nice and really uncomfortable at the same time. Sometimes I think it's easier to scowl on your birthday than have so many people shower you with affection...maybe this is the birthday where I decide that scowling isn't always better and it's hard but rewarding to open your heart to others.

A dear dear friend of mine leaves shortly to San Francisco...I am unsure when I will see her next, but I know I will miss her dearly. I think that sometimes we encounter people in the world with such large souls that the depth is somewhat overwhelming. And when we part ways, we can't help but feel at a loss...I think that is how I feel now. Though I hope and am certain that she will stay in my life for good.

This age sees the beginning of rising at 6:30 everyday, focusing on taking care of my body, and realizing that I need to help people on a regular basis to maintain my sanity and keep the waves of depression at bay. This is the dawn of file folders, organization, and facing the least desirable tasks. I feel like I'm finally growing up.

Top Moments of '06 (chronologically backward)

2006-12-30T18:37:00.000-05:00

-the bacon cheeseburger at red robbin for my birthday
-crying when giving a speech at my mother's 60th birthday party
-getting and accepting a judicial clerkship
-handing in my awr
-chocolate and butter scotch cookies with bacon lard burgers at abby's.
-the stoweflake upgrade!
-going to see avenue q and stuff happens...what wonderful and excellent surprises!
-running amok through the city with Deniz...especially that beerhouse in Astoria!
-chillin with my dad in Colombia and experiencing la cordillera
-eating ajiaco and sancocho
-climbing to the top of the beehive in maine with nicole, whitewater rafting, and sea kayaking
-finishing my spring sip
-the Chelsea art gallery openings on thurs.
-dancing with mary at the catty shack, et al
-our first encounter on st. mark's, bubble tea, book stores, and my performance of David Wojnarecz's (sp?) writings.
-chopping tia's hair off for good!
-the goat stew
-wonderland
-watching my mom get better and stronger after last winter.
-etc.

change

2006-12-21T17:59:00.000-05:00

Next semester will be much different than the last. I have successfully moved out of my flea ridden home. Gone are the days of listening to my immortal enemy's voice grate against the guitar strings of my soul. I relocate to a different place. A place that seems like what Vermont would and should be. Next semester I will be living in the biggest, nicest, and richest house I will have ever lived in my entire life. I figure might as well, for after this year I will relocate to a tiny apartment in the greater New York/NJ area for god knows how many years. I've managed to secure a job for myself as a judicial law clerk next year. I am very excited about it. The gentleman I will be working for is a lovely man. I'm still stressed though. Maybe it's post-semester traumatic stress disorder...and falling on rough times with a loved one.

2006-12-21T00:04:00.000-05:00

Video Games with an Edge

2006-12-16T17:15:00.000-05:00

Way Radical, Dude

Now Playing: Video Games With an Islamist Twist

By Jose Antonio Vargas

Washington Post Staff Writer
Monday, October 9, 2006; Page C01

A new video game lets players kill President Bush. It's called "Quest for Bush." It looks a lot like a game that hit the market three years ago, called "Quest for Saddam."

In the venerable shoot-'em-up genre, who's the hero and who's the enemy depends on who's programming the game.

"Quest for Bush," a.k.a. "Night of Bush Capturing," is a free online game released by the Global Islamic Media Front, a radical organization that has ties with al-Qaeda. Armed with a rifle, a shotgun or a grenade launcher, players navigate various missions that include "Jihad Growing Up," "Americans' Hell" and "Bush Hunted Like a Rat." In the final stage, you fight Bush.

It's the latest -- and most extreme -- addition to a small but growing list of Islamic video games, monitored by the Defense Department and much blogged about in gaming circles. Some are free, others are not. Either way, they champion issues from an Islamic perspective, in stark contrast to many Western-made games that generally cast Muslims and Arabs as the bad guys. Furthermore, they underscore a brewing game-design war between East and West, a simmering tension of who's writing (and rewriting) history.

"There's a very interesting tit-for-tat going on here, a weird kind of dialogue," says Ed Halter, author of the book "From Sun Tzu to Xbox: War and Video Games," published in May, and a contributing writer for the Village Voice. "And what's disconcerting about it is that the conversation is often reduced to the lowest common denominator of violent action in games, which is in a way very reflective of the overall way things are going right now in real life."

Radwan Kasmiya, a 31-year-old gamer, can't stand titles such as "Counter-Strike," "Close Combat: First to Fight" and "America's Army," the free online game -- with more than 7.5 million users -- released in 2002 by the U.S. Army to help bolster recruitment.

"We're the terrorist, the enemy, in these games," says Kasmiya. He runs the Syria-based Afkar Media, one of a handful of struggling commercial game publishers in the Islamic world. Speaking on the phone from his Damascus office, he's quick to distinguish his games from "Quest for Bush," which has been downloaded a few thousand times on the Internet. Two clips on the video-sharing site YouTube.com have been viewed nearly 11,000 times. "Nothing but propaganda," he says of that game. He's played it, he says, and calls it "hateful."

"UnderAsh," released by Afkar Media in 2002, views the first intifada from the eyes of Ahmad, a Palestinian teenager resisting the Israeli occupation. Last year a sequel was released. A teaser to "UnderSiege," which tells the stories of five Palestinian families during the second intifada, shows a Palestinian teenager being shot on the street; an Israeli soldier appears to pound him with a concrete block seconds later. "Our games are not propaganda," Kasmiya says. "Our games are a reflection of our history -- past or present. The fact is, most movies, most TV shows, most video games put Muslims in a bad light, so we have to try to tell our side of the story."

Retired Maj. Chris Chambers, deputy director of the Army Game Project, insists "America's Army" doesn't "pick on a single enemy." The country is at war, he says, and the terrorists depicted in "America's Army" come from "all over the world," including the Middle East. "There's no focus on one particular region or one particular people," says Chambers, who helped design the game.

But as with anything, people are free to interpret the game any way they want, he adds.

One of the first Islamic games to gain attention in the Middle East is a free online game called "The Stone Throwers," says Halter. It was created by a Syrian medical student and released in 2000, weeks after the start of the second intifada. According to its Web site, the game is "dedicated to those who lost their lives for the homeland and all those who are fighting for freedom." Other game publishers such as Techniat 3D and Imaginations -- the former based in Syria, the latter in the United Arab Emirates -- developed fantasy-based adventure games such as "Zoya" and "Legend of Zord." But both companies folded in the past five years, unable to find a sizable audience in the Middle East, where piracy is commonplace and U.S.-made games are popular, Kasmiya says. None of these games -- free or not -- have been purchased or downloaded "more than a few thousand times," he adds.

The Washington-based Middle East Media Research Institute, a nonpartisan group that translates Arabic language television and Web sites, says that in June, Sheik Nabil Al-Awadhi, who has a weekly show on the Kuwaiti channel Al-Rai TV called "Sa'at Saraha" ("An Hour of Sincerity"), spoke of the need for Islamic games that compete with Western games. He also suggested developing a game in which the Muslim player "slaughters the Jews and liberates the Al-Aqsa Mosque." In the West, they turn their wars against Muslims into games, he said, and Muslims should do the same.

Dennis McCauley, who runs the blog Gamepolitics.com, says: "There is a game design war taking place, at least in the sense that today's games are a mass communications vehicle for reaching young people. The Defense Department distributes 'America's Army' for free as both a recruiting tool and a way to market the image of our armed forces. The game is hugely popular. It's no surprise that Islamic extremists are trying to achieve the same goal and imitate that success."

This past summer, the Union of Islamic Student Societies, an Iranian political group, announced that it was developing a game -- as a retort to a U.S.-made game. Last year, the New York-based Kuma Games released a free online game called "Assault on Iran," in which players take on the role of a U.S. Special Forces soldier trying to destroy Iran's nukes. In the Iranian group's game, set for release this March, a fictional "Commander Bahman" fights U.S. Special Forces and rescues Iranian atomic scientists. In response to that response, Keith Halper, head of Kuma Games, said his company will create a sequel to the Iranian-made game from the United States' point of view.

"It's propaganda, but it's also a form of debate," Halper says. "We have made a point, they have responded."

The gunplay in "Quest for Bush" is crude, akin to "Doom," the godfather of shoot-'em-up games. The goal is to kill. It's in English and Arabic and takes about 30 minutes to play. In the beginning, the player goes around what looks like a U.S. military camp, with walls plastered with photos of President Bush, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld and British Prime Minister Tony Blair, among others.

"Quest for Bush" is a "mod"-- or modification -- of "Quest for Saddam," released by the California-based Petrilla Entertainment in 2003 for $14.95. The company sold about 3,000 copies of the game.

"They say imitation is the highest form of flattery. But I'm not flattered," says Jesse Petrilla, who created "Quest for Saddam." Last year he founded the United American Committee, a political action group that has used techniques such as hanging Osama bin Laden in effigy in front of a mosque in Culver City, Calif. He says his group seeks to remind Americans of "the threat that radical Islam poses to all of us."

His latest response in this gaming war, says the 23-year-old, is to make "Quest for Saddam" free for players.

Bukowski

2006-12-15T22:56:00.001-05:00

Success!

2006-12-14T22:09:00.000-05:00

I can smell the end of the semester around the corner. A few great changes lie ahead. A new past time, the absence of a friend, and rounding the corner of that third year endeavor. But before then, break and time with my loved ones.

You wanna give mommy what she wants??? Become a heterosexual!

2006-12-11T21:13:00.000-05:00

I think the headline of this post pretty much says it all. Ever had that sibling who couldn't deal with the fact that you're gay? I have one of those, well actually two, but the second isn't as vocal as the first.

I called up my sibling to ask him to help me chip in for a really nice birthday present for my mother. After all it is her 60th birthday and that only happens one time in a person's life. I was thinking of getting my mother something she really wants...like a winter coat (a few hundred dollars). When I confronted my brother with the idea, he told me that he was getting my mother what she wanted already. He told me he was buying her a cookbook ($30). I told him "mom hasn't cooked in years." He said "well that's what she wants and she doesn't want us to spend a lot of money on her, so I don't want to."

Everyone knows that parents always tell their children not to spend a lot of money on them. It's a lesson tried and true. Any selfless mother will say "don't get it for me, I know you don't have any money." The point is you're supposed to spend the money on them anyway! I brought this up with him, along with the fact that I thought he was being a cheap skate, and he went ballistic.

He started yelling "you wanna get mommy what she wants? Become a heterosexual! You really want to get mommy wants she wants? Go get married and become normal. If you ever call my house again I'm going to call the police!" And then he promptly hung up on me.

I'm not as shocked as the first time he decided to have a titty attack on the phone. The only problem is that this is a man who is a teacher, parent of one (expecting another), with a house in NYC, a Toyota Avalon, and a reputation as an "upstanding" member in his community. I'm shocked and surprised that such a person threatens his own siblings when they point out his blatant frugality.

This phone call was the cherry on my cake this evening. After receiving a rejection letter from someone I desperately wanted to work for, I feel defeated...and deflated. I think I have to learn how to distance myself from those who harbor secret feelings of hatred in their hearts. In this case, it will be relatively easy because my brother has threatened me with contacting the authorities. His grounds are baseless, but I know that I can't trust him. I wonder why I waited untill this point to figure it out.

Snow ball earth

2006-12-09T22:03:00.000-05:00

I find myself asking the craziest questions during finals. Naturally my queries have nothing to do with the subject I'm studying. I recently saw "An Inconvenient Truth" and I've been thinking alot more about glaciers and ice ages. Apparently, we are technically still in an ice age because we have sheets of ice over land masses (Antarctica and Greenland). I wonder how cold the world will get once we get into a deep freeze. There are several theories. One of my favorites is "Snow Ball Earth." Snow Ball Earth means that the entire planet will be covered by ice. Imagine that?

What scares me about global warming is the idea that the seas can rise anywhere from 20 to 200 feet. 200 feet seems like a lot to me. I guess we could kiss goodbye our favorite port city and pack our bags for the mountains.

The coolest part about glaciers is that they turn blue when they get old and heavy. The reason they turn blue is because all of the oxygen bubbles get pressed out and all we see is blue.*

*All of this information is from random sites on google and wickipedia

Fynlay Hughes

2006-12-06T23:47:00.000-05:00

Spontaneity lost

2006-12-04T15:45:00.000-05:00

I feel like as the days go by I continue to draw myself into neater and neater squares. I've become obsessive about coloring inside the lines, paranoid of people I once called friends, and resigned to a 30 yr. indentured servitude. My creativity karma is at an all time low. Justice Blackmun's death penalty jurisprudence only adds to the grey of Vermont's frosty clouds. I fear I've hit the pits of boredom and finding the exit is more impossible than ever.

The role of courts

2006-11-21T00:33:00.000-05:00

"Those whom we would banish from society or from the human community itself often speak in too faint a voice to be heard above society's demand for punishment. It is the particular role of courts to hear these voices, for the Constitution declares that the majoritarian chorus may not alone dictate the conditions of social life." Stone, The Common Law in the United States, 50 Harv.L.Rev. 4, 25 (1936).

Late fall

2006-11-05T00:54:00.000-05:00

It's getting cold out. Just popped a tire because the pressure was too low. The flurries are coming. So are the deadlines. Like the barren trees, I knew they'd come. Still in a mad scramble for the ultimate 8 hour filler. Except people are on a "low carb" diet these days and have no use for my pastries.

Requiem for a Mole

2006-10-03T00:51:00.000-04:00

Goodbye to Nicole's dear brown mole,
your departure has left a gaping hole.
I thought you were so cute and soft,
brown like the floor of a dirty loft.
Just know you scared us so
that's really why you had to go.
We thought you were the big bad "c,"
not the humble brown mole you were meant to be...
Just know I will miss you alot,
we'll bury you in a brown pot,
praying that you make it "above,"
we send you off with a great deal of love.

Actions speak louder than words

2006-09-16T15:06:00.000-04:00

If you haven't heard, the Pope and the Vatican are being "roasted over the coals" for a speech he gave at the University of Regensburg. In his speech he spoke about the juxtaposition between religion and violence. In it he quoted Byzantine Emperor Manuel II Paleologus as saying "show me just what Muhammad brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached."

The Muslim world strongly reacted to his statement. Muslim leaders in Pakistan, India, Palestine, and Turkey have asked the Pope to apologize. They claim that Islam is a religion of peace. Muslims have been protesting all over the world. In the West Bank city of Nablus, two churches were firebombed on Saturday in attacks claimed by a group which said it was protesting against the Pope's remarks. This is ironic because Muslims are using violent methods to protest the Pope's comments. By bombing churches they are proving the Pope's inadvertent point. In addition, I find it interesting that the President of Iran could stand up and make anti-Christian and anti-semitic remarks without anyone batting an eye, but when the Pope cites a 13th Century emperor, the Muslim world is up in arms. To conclude with a quote from a gentleman on the BBC News website "How is it OK for Muslims to burn effigies of the Pope but not for the Danish media to print cartoons of Mohammed? Am I missing something here?"

*the posted picture is from the BBC NEWS website. You can read more about this story at Pope 'sorry' for offence to Islam

Everything in its right place

2006-09-02T11:50:00.000-04:00

My life has been rather hectic these past few weeks. I'm attempting to get back into the swing of law school and get a job. Both tasks are not as easy as I thought they would be. I think that if I persevere and stay focused, all will fall into its right place.

Colombian Math

2006-07-23T15:42:00.000-04:00

*Please Note: The grammatical mistakes in the following post are due to the difficulty of using keyboards overseas (they are different).
The country of Colombia is a beautiful country. However, it is plagued by problems that are unimaginable. The biggest problem is Colombian math. My father and I came up with the term when we repeatedly experienced store cashiers, hotel managers, and street vendors overcharging us. The saddest part is that Colombians are hurting their fellow Colombians when everyone has to fear real thieves, rapists, and guerillas. Ive been travelling with my uncle (who has been in the Colombian military all his life), his wife, my cousin, and my father. Within the past week, I have encountered at least 5-8 instances of people attempting to overcharge us. I think it egregious that they are overcharging my family members, people who are Colombian, live in Colombia, and speak spanish fluently. When I first arrived I did not understand the paranoia and constant mistrust expressed by members of my family. I think I understand now. I fear (and know) that my experiences are nothing compared to what an average Colombian has experienced.

My trip has been entirely different than my trip to Guatemala. I find that at the end of the day I am incredibly morose and depressed. On a daily basis, I encounter so many stress factors that it is impossible not to be overwhelmed.

1. Colombian Math - see above.

2. Riding in the car - Every time I get into a car in Colombia, especially when I am travelling between cities, I constantly fear for my life. My uncle (he was the driver), as well as everyone else on the road, regularly cross the double yellow line to pass people. We will be going 100 km an hour, speeding toward a massive truck, on a narrow road high in the mountains, just to pass a car (or a few). Frequently we cant even see if there is another car coming because the roads are so narrow. In addition, we dont have any seat belts (cars without seat belts are the norm here). I thought I was a crazy driver, but my experiences in Colombia have completely redefined my definition of crazy driving.

3. Guerillas - Its a stress factor. I havent been stopped. But in this country, if you are using the highways, your chances are greater than sitting at home. This is how it works: The military has routine check points all along the highways to stop cars if they think things are out of the ordinary. The military frequently place road blocks in the middle of the road to stop cars. Similarly, the guerillas do the same thing. They stop cars to check if you are one of the people on their lists. Apparently they have lists of the wealthy Colombians who are required to pay FARC thousands of pesos to save their lives. If the person does not have the money to pay them, FARC will put the person on a payment plan. The FARC has a great deal of money, carry Sattelite phones and computers, and are able to check if the person has paid if they get stopped in the future. Anyone can be a candidate. Furthermore, if you choose to stay in the country side, or go to a resort, you have to make sure that the place will have guards watching the place.

4. Thieves - Thieves do the same thing as the military and guerillas. They place road blocks in the road, wait for buses of people or cars, and rob everyone blind.

5. A life is only worth 5-8 million pesos (currently US $3000-$5000). I heard of a story where a biker on my uncles street hit and killed an old man. The family settled for Col$8,000,000.00. At a conversion rate of Col $2,500 = US$1.00, that equals US $3,200. When we went to the Parque Del Cafe in the Zona Cafetera (coffee growing area), we bought insurance from the park that insured our lives for a mere
Col $5,000,000.00 (US $2,000). Its a stress factor because I know that if anything were to happen to me here, my life isnt worth much. Especially since I am a gringa.

Being here has made me appreciate the United States so much more. Dont get me wrong, Ive met plenty of Colombians who are friendly, warm and welcoming. However, it is difficult not to be suspicious of the average person I encounter on the street.

Independencia de Colombia

2006-07-20T12:18:00.000-04:00

papa

my first few days

2006-07-14T15:22:00.000-04:00

Bogota is a truly magnificent city. I feel like I´m in more of a European city than anything. My spanish is coming along nicely. I get alot of practice by spending time with my family members. Security in the city is intense. Everything has a fence around it with guards at the entrance. Any supermarket, apartment complex, or shopping center has fences and guards. The apartment complex I live in has guards with rifles at all the gates, and some guards in between. Other than that, I feel perfectly safe.

A few words

2006-07-09T18:32:00.000-04:00

All those interested in a clean and wholesome vacation need look no further than Maine! In short: hiking, rock climbing, white water rafting, sea kayaking, canoeing, and a slammin' cabin to boot! If you're interested, contact me for details.

Colombia is less than 24 hours away. I am slightly nervous and anxious because of the security risks. The fact that I'm meeting my family at the airport reassures me greatly. I keep reminding myself that I'm going to a massive metropolis of 7 million, at an altitude of 8000+ feet...Bogota will be far different than my experience of the small Guatemalan village of San Andres...until next time! Nos Vemos!

on the road again...

2006-07-01T09:32:00.000-04:00

2006-06-04T22:06:00.000-04:00

8 days a week

one minute

2006-05-26T13:34:00.000-04:00

lost?

2006-04-20T15:02:00.000-04:00

New Photos on Flickr

2006-04-19T11:04:00.000-04:00

Update: You can find loads more of my pictures on Flickr.com

Sometimes life is so beautiful

2006-04-10T12:01:00.000-04:00

I take time to write this blog entry because it memorializes stories in my life that I don't wish to forget. I also write to entertain my readers with stories of hope, community, life, and love. In the interests of privacy and the desire to share these moments with my readers, my writing style will fluctuate. All of the following events are from this past weekend.

An opportunity to connect myself with the random souls around me in 30 seconds
I was riding on the subway with a friend of mine. We had just wrapped up training for my new job, and we were looking to chill. When we were on the C train, a little African Amercian boy of 9 or 10 came on with a full box of m&m's squished under his arm. In a loud, strong, booming voice, which you knew would later wake up souls in his adult years, said "My name is Arthur Hendricks*, I am selling chocolate today. I am not selling it to pay for my school's basketball uniform, I am selling the chocolate because I am an entrepenuer." I was so impressed. Something about him reminded me of myself when I was a young child. It is so encouraging to see young people (children) take the initiative. Furthermore, I was even more encouraged by his brazen honesty. After 15 seconds, and with my help, he was one bag of m&m's lighter, and a dollar richer. In the next 5 seconds we got off the subway, and behold, there sat a homeless man who looked like he was in a ragged state. I thought it over for the next 5 seconds, and handed him my bag of m&m's. As we walked away a teenage girl approached us with incredulity...she had seen it all. Apparently the events that had just occured affected her. I'm not writing this story to toot my own horn. I think that most people would do as I did in my situation. Instead, I write this story to celebrate how fortunate I am. With a dollar, 30 seconds, and quick thinking, I was able to directly help two people, and foster a sense of community in our neighborhood of 8 million.

Reappraisal of NYC's lesbian nightclubs
The winner of the best women's nightclub in the city is Cattyshack. After a saturday night that any sane person would dream of, I have decided to crown cattyshack as THE place to go. I have never seen and met so many charming and wonderful men and woman in one place. The vibe was chill. The women were beautiful, foreign, local, butchy, femme, etc. The greatest part is that all sorts of women were represented, and many of them were in the tops of their "genre." I danced for 3 and 1/2 hours straight. Cheers to many fun summer evenings to come. And all the party revelers who shake it out on the dance floor.

Shopping recommendations
Tompkins Square Park Farmer's Market - Avenue A and St. Marks.
A really cute market with delicious, all natural, apple juices, apples, organic chickens and steaks (which I think may have given me slight food poisoning so I warn against it), fresh corn bread, corn tortillas, rolls of bread, and pies. The farmers market is on Sundays from 11-5 (pretty sure, just double check the times).

flashes of memory
cooking chicken and rice,
fuzzies,
took a walk to nowhere and nearly got lost on the way,
there and back,
eyes, nose, softness,
stomache pains,
finally feeling like i'm doing something right.

Made in China

2006-03-29T10:53:00.001-05:00

While I hate to jump on the "obsessed with China" bandwagon, I feel it important to critique our current state of affairs. The focus of this blog entry will be to educate in part, and to advocate a position that renounces all trade agreements with China. I understand that assuming such a position, is at best, wishful thinking, however, I will assume this position no less.

This past saturday I was in Union Square by chance. It had been a long night/morning/afternoon, and I desperately wanted to return to brooklyn to sleep. As I was saying goodbye to my friend (who was heading to work), we noticed this protest going on.

The protesters were mostly Falun Gong practioners. They were protesting the human rights violations commited against Falun Gong practioners in China. At first, I remembered that the Chinese Communist Party (ccp) was notorious for its human rights abuses. We've all heard about China's occupation of Tibet. We all know about Tiannemen Square. We've all heard about the inhuman work conditions in its monstruous factories...

We haven't heard about how the Chinese government performs operations on live Falun Gong practioners to remove their organs. Apparently, selling organs from live bodies is a particularly lucrative business. Once they perform the operation (with very little anesthetic), they incinerate the bodies. After doing some "online research", I discovered that Falun Gong practioners are kept in camps and routinely tortured as well.

(Please Note: Falun Gong practioners are being persecuted because their practice of excercises like Tai Chi + belief in kindness truth and wisdom, is enormously popular in China)

I was revolted to learn this. It sickened me to realize that we are drowning in the quagmire of Iraq to promote "a better life for Iraqis", while we funnel billions of dollars of trade into Chinese coffers.

But it doesn't stop there.

I went to go see "Mardi Gras Made in China" at Cinema Village last night. The movie was mediocre, and watching beads and breasts for 75 minutes did grow tiresome. Of course, it was sad to see these girls/women working 16 hour days at lightning speed to make beads that would be used for a few hours and then thrown away...and then I got to thinking. It wasn't the working conditions of these woman that upset me, it was the purpose of it all. These women largely come from peasant villages and are simply interested in making money and friends...like most of us. However, due to free market reforms in China, and the Capitalist beast, these women work 14-16 hour days (not much chill time) and are paid 10 cents an hour (while the chinese owner of the factory recoups $1+ million in profit; and his American counterpart $36 million). What is wrong with this picture??? The craziest part, is that when the women in the factory were shown pictures of what was done with the beads, they were absolutely incredulous.

(Please Note: Mardi gras beads are used to get people to flash you in exchange for beads...wonderful society we have here)

What I'm wondering is why does our society demand such rubbishness? Why does our society crave trinkets and trash??? That's right, all those little toys and play things from china are not produced by some giant machine, they are produced by the small fingers of chinese children painting and molding these trinkets. Hours and hours of labor for what? For drunken debauchery? For more trash than this world can already handle? For cowing the Chinese working people into holes of endless hours of labor, with pennies for compensation??? For a moment of intoxicated emptiness? Is this what we've come to?

And as our dollars continue to pour into China, and as our economy continues its codependancy on China, we lose our ability to stand up against the atrocities carried out by the Chinese government.

So how does trade figure in? China needs us. America is one of its biggest customers. I suggest we use trade agreements as leverage in getting China to reform the situation for the Falun Gong. Of course, this is all wishful thinking.

So I propose that we all stop consumming worthless mass produced shit...no more crappy trinkets for me!!!

and until then we must never forget that our country has sold its soul down the river...

2006-03-26T17:15:00.000-05:00

east new york

2006-03-14T18:33:00.000-05:00

early spring

2006-03-08T16:24:00.000-05:00

The week in review

2006-02-27T10:26:00.000-05:00

Art Gallery Openings in Chelsea

Nothing quite like free booze and conversations about art with strangers.

Reblaw Conference at Yale

I only attended two panels this year because I had a terrible hangover from the night before. I became heavily intoxicated at the People's Progressive Party and found myself dancing in the street, with my friends, to the droning sounds of a car alarm in downtown new haven.

The panels I attended were a disappointment. Probably because I chose them poorly. I attended a panel on LGBT Issues and Religion. I expected the panel to delve into or touch upon some of the issues I've mentioned previously on this blog. However, the panel narrowly focused on how to convince the religious right to accept gay marriage...a theme overplayed and as futile as trying to solve the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict.

The second panel I attended was on Truth Commissions. The problem with the second panel was that the speakers were so incredibly erudite and specialized that I felt like I had walked into the middle of a class without having done the reading.

The ride down was better due to a serendipitous event and a cigarette habit I'm trying to kick. I had the pleasure of meeting and riding down with Dan, the Pianist (you have to let me know if and when your next concert is), and his partner, the film maker Parvez Sharma, who was one of the panelists at the conference. Because these guys were so cool and the movie will definitely be phenomenal, I highly recommend checking out Parvez's film coming out next year (should be in Sundance). The name of the film is "In the Name of Allah." It deals with the intersection between homosexuality and Islam. Needless to say, I will definitely watch it. Cheers to Dan and Parvez!!!

Catty Shack v. Cubby Hole v. Metropolitan(not this week, but seems like a good place to review all three).

The biggest difference I've noticed between Cubby Hole and Catty Shack is that the Cubby Hole seems to have a greater composition of femme women... Take that as you may.

As far as picking up chicks, getting numbers, and making friends, I'd say that all three places are pretty similar. I might venture that Metropolitan on Wednesday nights may be slightly better, but only because it has been mighty kind to my home girl, T.

A (potential) down side to Cubby Hole is that they don't allow more than one person in the bathroom at a time. So for all those drunk and lustful girls, your primary option for rocking it at the bar with your honey in "private" is freezing outside in ten degrees. For all those interested in bathroom "fun," check out Catty Shack. Cheers to Josh, the straight guy who got head in Catty Shack's bathroom...oh what an odd sight to see at 4am...

and thanks to all my new friends who came out on Saturday night...it may have been a random mix of people but we sure did rock that shit.

DJ Dumbass*

2006-02-15T10:50:00.000-05:00

I feel like I've just emerged from one of the craziest days ever. Valentines day. I hate it. It makes me sick to see so many people walking around carrying flowers. I wonder how many people actually love the ones they are bearing flowers for. While a tirade about the commercialization of love may be appropriate at this point, I'd like to vent about musicians instead.

If you have ever seen Curb your enthusiasm, you might think of the following story as a "Larry David moment."

The Stage: A cold (but not too cold) wet, slushy night in the East Village.

The Sordid Story: I went to this bar/club to see a DJ I liked and who I've never seen spin before. I made a "sacrifice" by going to the drum and bass show because I knew I would be dead-tired for work the next day. The DJ wasn't supposed to come on until 12:30. I stayed anyway.

While I waited for the DJ to come on, I told my friend that I noticed someone smoking a cigarette at the bar, and suggested we do likewise. We did. Just after I lit up, the DJ (the one I came to see) told the bartender that he wouldn't spin at the club because people were smoking. He looked flatly at me while he told her (we were the only ones smoking at this point).

When I saw him tell her, I nearly jumped out of my seat. Actually, I did. I ran up to him and told him I had specifically come to hear him spin and that my friend and I would smoke outside. He told me he wouldn't do it because he disagreed with the bar's policy...

WTF?!? I understand that smoke may be offensive, but disappointing fans, breaking contracts, and being a general dickhead is not acceptable. Because he doesn't like smoke, he should inform his fans and business associates on his website and through other methods of communication. I cannot believe that he did not negotiate his contract to ensure that it would be a smoke free environment. You might say that he shouldn't have to negotiate a contract because smoking is illegal. But if you say that you ignore the fact that the venue is a club. Anyone could tell you that people smoke, do drugs, and drink in clubs. His failure to check on this detail, makes him a terrible businessman and an arrogant musician.

*A fictitious name

2006-01-31T13:17:00.000-05:00

portrait of an art gallery

headlines

Seized With Heavy Hand at Border, for Paperwork Errors 02.10.06 - NYTIMES

Society denies conventional purpose to homosexuals

2006-01-03T18:31:00.000-05:00

Academics have theorized and analyzed homesexuals' alienation. Important to this inquiry is an examination of religion's role on an individual's communal connections and sense of morality. Three major world religions, Judaism, Christianity and Islam, discriminate against homosexuals. More specifically, these religions prohibit homosexual acts (and thoughts in some cases.) These religions not only prohibit homosexual acts but have helped form Society's traditional bedrock of morals. Homosexuals who initially practice, or hope to practice, are alienated from religions' cultures and gods.

Homosexuals have few options in reconciling their faith with their instincts:

a. Practicing in cognitive dissonance. Practicing and feeling guilty by acknowledging their wrongful acts and thoughts.

b. Practice and state that the law does not apply and is archaic.

c. Disregard three major religions because a god that prohibits one's "natural insticts" can go f**k himself (or herself).

These options alienate and isolate homosexuals in the following ways:

a. Practicing in cognitive dissonance does not help a person's self image and sanity. Constant guilt, and shame because of one's "weaknesses" will diminish an individuals' self respect.

b. Stating that the law does not apply has a greater implication on an individual's alienation than choice a. The strength in religion lies in it's ability to foster a strong connection with a greater community that is based on the micro unit of the family. Because these religions ostracize homosexuals and the homosexual family unit, they prevent homosexuals from fully partaking in their services and communities. Furthermore, because these religions create gendered roles, homosexuals cannot identity with their religion.

c. By disregarding three major religions a homosexual is left with discovering spirituality and rediscovering a god that does not disapprove of their actions. The majority of the world practices these religions and have found them to be comfortable alternatives to a lack of purpose. A homosexual must craft and redefine his/her god and sense of morals. He or she must find purpose in his/her life, drawing on nothing but their inner core (provided that they know how to find it). Maybe this unsolicited task is a good thing.

Note:
1. Watch out for spring fever...remember nothing new!
2. Ya can't throw away shabbos.
3. No eulogies on chanukah.
4. Long-time friends kick ass for those connections are resilient and timeless.

2005-12-24T14:49:00.000-05:00

New Years!

Options for New Years Weekend (a.k.a. what the hell do i do???)

Shabbos Kodesh with the mishpacha

Ulrich Schnauss solo or...

Lightshows and Goa Trance with Alex, Sid and Co

paul okenfeld and sandra collins - there is something to be said for seeing the guy whose music set the stage for my love of electronic music...

Chanukah Chagigah with the long lost Ora-lites

Body Temple

Catty Shack's Fur Party

and of course,THE evening adventure with alex...i wonder where we'll take each other this time

2005-12-20T11:31:00.000-05:00

another bed
by: charles bukowski

another bed
another woman

more curtains
another bathroom
another kitchen

other eyes
other hair
other
feet and toes.

everybody's looking.
the eternal search.

you stay in bed
she gets dressed for work
and you wonder what happened
to the last one
and the one before that . . .
it's all so comfortable--
this love-making
this sleeping together
the gentle kindness--

after she leaves you get up and use her
bathroom,
it's all so intimate and so strange.
you go back to bed and
sleep another hour.

when you leave it's with sadness
but you'll see her again
whether it works or not.

you drive down to the shore and sit
in your car. it's almost noon.

--another bed, other ears, other
ear rings, other mouths, other slippers, other
dresses
colors, doors, phone numbers.
you were once strong enough to live alone.
for a man nearing sixty you should be more
sensible.

you start the car and shift,
thinking, I'll phone Jeanie when I get in,
I haven't seen her since Friday.

2005-12-15T18:37:00.000-05:00

SINE QUA NON

sine qua non (sI-nee kway non or sin-ay kwah nohn), n. [Latin "without which not"] An indispensable condition or thing; something on which something else necessarily depends. -- Also termed conditio sine qua non.

Black's Law Dictionary (8th ed. 2004).

2005-12-12T20:04:00.000-05:00

a full circle

2005-12-06T20:19:00.000-05:00

Sunshine...

2005-11-30T15:14:00.000-05:00

fading.

Turkeyday moments

2005-11-28T10:35:00.000-05:00

Better than expected. Fortunate enough to dance in catty shack with a friend I haven't seen in over a year; to create a 2-person sidewalk dance party on Broome and 6th Ave. with the sweetest boy I know; to eat pork, turkey, and brisket on the day; to experiment with macrobiotic food; to be surrounded by family friends and loved ones; to make funky tunes; play with my nephews and niece; and do it up in the city. everyday i say i'm a fortunate human being, but now i really feel it.

tentative pre-turkey day thoughts

2005-11-22T11:29:00.000-05:00

going somewhere?

2005-11-17T11:54:00.000-05:00

god, i wish i was.

daylight savings

2005-11-10T16:30:00.000-05:00

2005-11-03T14:23:00.000-05:00

Jon

2005-10-30T21:15:00.000-05:00

goodbye dirty dish water,
and soppy chunks of bread,
the catch is in the hatch.

Goodbye leaves on trees,
harriet miers,and
scooter libby.

goodbye to confusion, crushes,
and misguided love.

goodbye to summer's nice moments,
pachel, and everything else.

i won't forget you.

Mudslides in Guatemala

2005-10-12T08:42:00.000-04:00

The highlands of Guatemala have become one of many places in Central America that have been hard hit by Hurricane Stan. The Hurricane caused mudslides and deaths to many. When I went on a hike this summer to Lago de Atitlan, I hiked in the area that was hit. Unfortunatley, the town of Panajachel was destroyed as well. It makes me so sad to hear that due to the storm trash, sewage and refuse have rushed into Lago de Atitlan, one of the most beautiful lakes in the world. I was speaking with a friend of mine and he said that one of the reasons why there was so much devastation was because the mountainsides are stripped of trees for logging and so when it rains, there is nothing to keep the dirt in place. It makes me so sad to see that not only do people have to destroy their environment to survive, but essentially, their destruction of their environment, imperils their survival. I hope that the Guatemalan Government will make it their top priority to thoroughly clean the lake. Not only is the lake an excellent source of tourism for the region, but it is a national treasure in its capacity as one of the most beautiful lakes in the world.

Foliage

2005-10-01T17:47:00.000-04:00

It's too late...or maybe it's not.

2005-09-01T13:15:00.000-04:00

Although my first week back in the States has not been the brightest (much Carole King and frequent encounters with Montezuma), I woke up today and the sun was shining (in both the literal and proverbial sense). It only occurred to me today that just a week ago, I was in Guatemala. It’s amazing how our “pre-travel mindsets” rush in, and sweep away the superficial layers of calmness and tranquility one attains through vacation. I don’t think I will ever be able to travel for the sake of traveling ever again. I hate being a tourist. Being a tourist is like going to the Zoo. You stare at all the animals, but don’t actually get to pet any of them. I’ve always hated the Zoo, and so I hate the role of an observer/consumer while traveling. I also don’t have much desire to travel to Europe or other “developed countries”. Europe and other “developed” countries just offer a different version of Western ideology prevalent in US society, which I think is the source of great malaise in our society.

My experience in Guatemala was beautiful because I found myself doing something that truly made me happy. I’ve come to realize that immersing myself in cultures entirely different than Western Culture, exploring the wonders of nature, and actually helping people, instead of solely focusing on myself, is what is important to me. I look forward to being an attorney, not only because it will necessarily involve helping others, but it will, hopefully, provide me with a comfortable enough lifestyle, to afford me the time, opportunity, and funds to volunteer all over the globe.

Something I’ve heard people say is “Before you save the world, you have to save yourself”. Summer 2005 has been a crash course in that proverb. After working at Legal Aid, for FREE, I began to detest the idea of doing anything that involved helping people. When I went to Guatemala, I was reminded that I truly love to help people. Although I wasn’t being paid in San Andres either, the experience was entirely different than my experience with Legal Aid. I think it was partially because I was receiving something in return from the community. The simple lifestyle that I led in San Andres gave me peace of mind. And I think that is the secret to happiness.

Guatemala

2005-08-28T13:46:00.000-04:00

i miss it already...

The Water Tank For the School

a child who attends the school

San Andres

Tikal

livingston

yo quiero guatemala (es correcto???)

2005-08-24T16:44:00.000-04:00

ok. some i´m currently sitting in the guatemala city airport waiting for my flight at 6:40 am tomorrow morning. things i never want to forget about guatemala:

don´t drink the water, friendly children, mateo´s philosophy about activism ¨i don´t do meetings, i get things done¨, washing my clothes in the pila, anorexic farm and domestic animals, huge spiders, the power of not talking, just doing, waking up at 6am every morning of my vacation, no machines, no cars, just your bare hands elbow grease and two feet, patience, the gypsy kings, no environmental regulations, no child labor laws, bargaining for everything, toilets without toilet seats, fried chicken with rice and beans and tortillas for breakfast at 6am, coco locos and tapados, vendors who never have any change, tin roofs and mosquito nets, the crazy energy generated prior to a storm on the carribean, the garifuna, tikal, meeting people from around the world who are concerned with the welfare of individuals in developing countries, the wicked cool volunteers at quetzal trekkers...cheers to george and craig!!! the majestic views of the volcanoes surrounding lago de atitilan, buen provencha, mucha gusta, cuanto questa....yeah. law school here i come..................................

Adios

2005-08-07T21:24:00.000-04:00

I embark on my journey to Central America tomorrow morning. I am nervous, excited, and apprehensive about the whole thing. and until then...

Sexual education for non-Heterosexuals

2005-08-03T11:55:00.000-04:00

When I think of "safe sex" I think: use a condom. It seems that once recognition of the Aids epidemic began to pick up steam in the late eighties/early ninties, a huge education campaign was launched by the Department of Health to inform the public about Aids and other STD's. The problem with these financially intense education campaigns is that they are not geared to the entire public. STD education is primarily focused on Heterosexual sex. The government should tell women who sleep with women that it is important to wear gloves and use dental dams during sex. Health care providers (planned parenthood) still tell women who sleep with women that the risk of contracting HIV is decreased because they are sleeping with women. I have yet to see research that validates this. I wonder why dental dams and gloves are not given out at STD testing facilities and why the risk of contracting a sexually transmitted disease through female-female relations is not openly publicized. Women who sleep with women are not treated equally, and the needs of this portion of our population continue to go unmet...

John Bolton's Appointment

2005-08-02T11:04:00.000-04:00

Why am I not surprised?

2005-07-30T22:24:00.000-04:00

moss

2005-07-30T22:23:00.002-04:00

2005-07-30T22:23:00.001-04:00

anne

2005-07-30T22:23:00.000-04:00

Top of Mountain

Mount Mansfield

2005-07-30T21:28:00.000-04:00

Anne's Birsday
I had the pleasure,(although sometimes I was panting) of hiking up something like 4,000+ feet of rock with my best bud. It was glorious. The first hour was incredibly difficult. I thought I was nearly not going to make it. However, once I discovered that I may have had a blister, everything else seemed a bit more manageable. I just went slower. It took us 2 and half hours to go up the entire thing. The mountain had many rocks on it. When we nearly got to the top, it appeared that we were in the Alpine Region. The nice girls at the top of the mountain (park employees)were kind enough to explain to us that the growth there was not grass but really alpine growth, and that we should be mindful not to step on it. The peak was the highest peak in Vermont. Heading down the mountain was much easier. I found that when I ran down the mountain I was able to control my speed better. An axiom: In order to go slow, you must run fast....very applicable for a mountain hike. Afterwards we barbequed and sat by the river...the air is so fresh here. Until next time.

Races and Vermont

2005-07-28T13:13:00.000-04:00

Past: I had the pleasure (or pain) of running in a 5K Race this Week. I came in 1288 out of 1420 (approx.). My speed was 12:46 per mile. There is nothing quite like running around on a humid sunny day. Luckily I had the pleasure of being accompanied by my family members who eagerly sweated out the entire ordeal with me.

Presently: Gearing up for my trip to Vermont with my bestest bud for her birthday (and moving). The weekend is mine!!! My internship will be over the end of next week. I've made many motions this summer, some airing on the more vulgar side while frustrated in traffic. Because of all this legal research I can't wait to take a crack at appellate advocacy (I'm being 1/2 sincere and 1/2 insane)this fall. And now onto my motion to vacate an arbitrator's award...

City of New London CT allowed to reposses property for private development interests

2005-06-23T11:17:00.000-04:00

Justices Stevens, Kennedy, Souter, Ginsburg, and Breyer found that the city of New London is allowed to reposses property in order to build Malls and private developments. The city's move is designed to promote more jobs and a greater Tax revenue base. However, as stated in the article, the Supreme Court is supporting some private interests over others. The issue is whether or not private Malls and developments can be labeled "public use". Although the government will be receiving tax revenues and creating jobs, that is merely a byproduct of an individual/group reaping a huge profit, and evicting other private individuals from their homes.NY TIMES: Justices, 5-4, Back Seizure of Property for Development 6/23/05

PBS is going to the dogs and the federal government doesn't encourage acceptance of sperm from gay males...and the world keeps chugging along.

2005-05-08T00:39:00.000-04:00

PBS is being attacked for it's "liberal bias" by the Republican chairman of Corporation for Public Broadcasting. PBS under fireI am shocked that members of the federal government are defining the "appropriate" political stance a public medium should take. PBS may Channel largely funded by the federal government, but it is also supported by members throughout the country. The fact that Chairman Kenneth Tomlinson wants to "imbue public broadcasting with the notion of balance" uncomfortably echoes Fox News Channel's rhetoric of "fairness and unbiased". Conservative ideology is not only dictating what family values should be, but are injecting its views into main stream media by tampering with public access channels.
On another sad note, the FDA will be implementing new guidelines regarding the acceptance of sperm from gay males. The FDA has deemed sperm from monogamous gay males to pose a greater risk of disease. I am unnerved at the blatant homophobia that explicitly manifests itself in our federal government. You can read more about it here: The Homophobic FDA

Another Attack on First Amendment Rights

2005-04-21T15:22:00.000-04:00

Unfortunately, high school students in Minnesota are being threated with expulsion because they are wearing pins that say "I Heart my vagina". Speech cannot be censored merely because it is offensive. Furthermore, the speech of "I heart my vagina" is not within the unprotected categories of free speech outlined by the Supreme Court. I'm glad to see that the ACLU has taken up this case; I don't think the school stands a chance, if it is going to face a first amendment challenge. You can read more about the story at
I Heart my vagina

Calling the kettle black

2005-04-20T10:50:00.000-04:00

Representative Tom Delay (R) is currently embroiled in a fiasco with the House ethics commitee for paying his family members loads of $$ and bribing other House representatives for votes. Interestingly, Delay has decided to go after federal judges in an effort to determine what "good behavior" is. NY Times: DeLay Outlines Strategy Against Federal Judges
I wonder how Delay's constituents, NY Times: In DeLay's Home District, Rumblings of Discontent Surface even put up with the man. DeLay does not have any respect for the rules of the House or the separation of powers. Someone has to give him a civics lesson.

Another Reason Why John Bolton's Nomination Should Be Delayed

2005-04-19T23:02:00.000-04:00

John Bolton's explicit distate of the United Nations is evident in multiple speeches he has given. Here is a link to truthout's multimedia page which has a video clip of John Bolton's articulation of distate towards the UN.

John Bolton Clip